it's 2 am at night and I am typing out another moment in my life here that marks another history, it hurts bad enough to type this out, but I need to get it out of my mind. it was just yesterday that the girl I confessed my feelings to, my clossest friend in college library, I realised I probably hurt her and myself.
I would never have choosen to reveal my feelings at that moment in the library to rachel wan yesterday at that very day, moment if I knew better what to do and understood the situation. just like our closest friend and teacher says, it's pretty clear what her intention is and I didn't understand her, I blame myself for that part and did the mistake by walking out, which I relly cannot avoid.
I'm sorry if I failed to understand you rachel, and I'm sorry if I had to tell you about my feelings when you relly didn't want anything close relationship between us, i'm sorry that you're feeling guilt right now that I never want to have to put you through and I hope this time you can forgive me for this. I can only hope that in time you can understand me and still think of me as a friend again.
most of all I want you to keep the star wars episode 3 book, it's a gift from me, you always said you wanted to own 1, and you relly loved star wars, the only thing I care is just to see that you're happy.